Showing posts from 2015

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How to Find Lasting Love

4 Rules for Surviving Dating Slowing down the dating process is necessary—but challenging. This past weekend, I ran into a friend at a restaurant who has just begun dating someone new. My friend shared with me later just how anxiety-provoking this new relationship has become. After a few weeks, they've officially entered that awkward phase where uncertainty is king, and I'm sure each member of the couple is spending a great deal of time talking about the relationship with their respective friends. Oh, the drama that new love brings!
The beginning of a new relationship is scary because you don't really know the person you're dating, so you can't be sure what you're going to get. In other words, you're investing in a relationship based purely on faith, or your hope that this new person will be good for you. But let's all admit what a risk it is to start falling in love! Can you imagine taking a thousand dollars and putting it into a …

Low Sexual Desire

What Is Low Sexual Desire? People normally differ in the degree of sexual appetite they have. There is no single standard of sexual desire, and desire differs not only from person to person but also in the same person over one's life span.
One of the most common sexual complaints among couples is a disparity in sexual desire. Sexual desire can be low for a vast variety of reasons, many of them psychological and interpersonal. But that doesn't necessarily make it a disorder. It becomes a diagnosable condition only when it diminishes the quality of one's life and creates distress, or a disparity arises in the sex drives of partners, evolving into a matter of unresolved contention in the relationship. Loss of sexual desire, clinically known as Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder (HSD) can both result from relationship problems and cause them.
Moreover, HSDD is almost invariably a relative matter. Partners who use the degree of sexual desire experienced early in a re…

Love Letters From Vietnam

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NEW YORK, Nov. 9, 2015 /Forty million veterans have served in the United States military since 1776 - yet very few have their story shared. But a chance encounter between a military daughter and a critically-acclaimed musician led to discovering a story of service, sacrifice and redemption during one of America's most fascinating wars. Jennifer Fuller was sitting at a theater in Austin, TX, at a performance by singer-songwriter Alex Woodard, when she was captivated by his songs based off of letters he had received. Having found a cardboard box filled with letters written back in time by her late father - a sergeant during the Vietnam War - and a present day compilation of notes she penned to him, Jennifer had a feeling: she had letters for Alex – and perhaps he had a song for her. Her hunch held strong, and after they met, Alex was immediately inspired to bring Sergeant John Fuller's story…

10 Reasons You Can’t Communicate with a Narcissistic Borderline Woman

Emotionally abusive narcissistic and borderline women are masters of spin control and pile driving their “reality” home through brute verbal force and emotional reasoning. If you’re involved with a NPD and/or BPD woman, you know these invective communication strategies firsthand.
This kind of woman clings to her belief system no matter how many times she’s confronted with incontrovertible evidence to the contrary. In fact, the more wrong she is, the greater the outrage and histrionics she displays.
The next time you challenge your BPD/NPD partner’s points of view, lies, distortions, unilateral pronouncements or unfounded accusations, notice how she responds. Your discussion probably turns into a one-sided argument replete with vitriolic theatrics and threats very quickly.
Here are some common communication control tactics of emotionally abusive narcissistic and/or borderline woman:
1. The Big Bamboozle. Here’s how it works: Emotionally abusive woman  begin a conversation/attac…

The 18 things lost forever (which is 19)

by F.Guzzardi
Theline of thehorizonin NewDelhitheafternoon, when the sun seems to want toride theearth beforeshut downin the silenceof a prayerThe handson yourbraided hairbetweenmy fingersandthe consequencesofall lovesThe desire tosurprising, even with asmileornotalk about anythingThe wordsof the mostdearfriendsthat we have notbeen able torememberThe idealsof anycolorSomeone whoisleftwithout asking permissionThewonderfullicentiousnessofParisian womenTheWorldcup 94Thericotta cheese  ice creamfrom "Giacco"at  SyracuseThe politiciansboringand the funnycomediansOutraged bya warThe desire towatch TVThe last filmofSwarzeneger(suchyou write?)Theassand titsof womenin Italian televisionBerlusconiThe carin a parking lotofWalmartFaithTheline for to seetheSacra SindoneHope (alwaysthe last to die)

14 Signs of Psychological and Emotional Manipulation

How to spot a manipulator
Psychological manipulation can be defined as the exercise of undue influence through mental distortion and emotional exploitation, with the intention to seize power, control, benefits and/or privileges at the victim’s expense.
It is important to distinguish healthy social influence from psychological manipulation. Healthy social influence occurs between most people, and is part of the give and take of constructive relationships. In psychological manipulation, one person is used for the benefit of another. The manipulator deliberately creates an imbalance of power, and exploits the victim to serve his or her agenda.
Below is a list of fourteen “tricks” manipulative people often use to coerce others into a position of disadvantage, excerpted from by book (click on link): “How to Successfully Handle Manipulative People (link is external)”. This is not meant to be an exhaustive list, but rather a compilation of subtle as well as strident exampl…

Fear of Damage to Children in Polyamorous Families

In my capacity as an expert on polyamory, I sometimes get quesitons from concerned parents, grandparents, and other well-meaning adults who are worried that polyamorous families might be harmful to children. In this blog series I have already addressed some issues relevant to children in poly families such as the status of children in polyamorous families, when partners leave polyamorous families with children, and how kids deal with their parents' families of origin or other sources of stigma in their lives. Below, I include a concerned parent's question and my response to it. 
Myself and my boyfriend recently have taken on a girlfriend, so we have formed a triad. My question is how do I explain to my young children that this is not a normal lifestyle choice and that it is not expected out of them when they grow older? My mother has expressed concern to me about this because she thinks that me having not only a boyfriend or a girlfriend but having both could be dama…

What Do Hypoactive Sexual Desire and PTSD Have in Common?

Jeffrey Lieberman M.D.Shrink Speak  The politics of challenged disorders and drug development
The FDA finally approved Addyi, the controversial drug known as the female Viagra, for the treatment of flagging sexual desire in women. Efforts to make such a drug available to women have been ongoing since the introduction of medications to treat sexual dysfunction in 1998, and despite the FDA’s rejection of the drug in 2010 and 2013.
Source: iStock/Used with Permission However, Addyi is no Viagra. Viagra, the blockbuster drug by Pfizer, is indicated for erectile dysfunction in men, which occurs as a function of age and illness (such as diabetes and prostate cancer), and produces dramatic effects with very low risk of serious side effects. Viagra is a proven drug that treats an irrefutable condition.
In contrast, Addyi has only modest therapeutic benefits and a significant risk of adverse effects. Moreover, Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder, the condition that Addyi is inte…

The Most Remarkable Thing About the Pope’s Visit

Addressing a crowd of 50,000 gathered outside of the U.S. Capitol, Pope Francis made his usual request to the crowd: “Pray for me.” What he said next, though, was truly remarkable. “And if there are among you any who do not believe, or cannot pray, I ask you please to send good wishes my way.”
When he mentioned nonbelievers, I was sure he was going to say next that he hoped nonbelievers would be inspired—that they would reconsider. But he didn’t—he simply asked those who do not believe to wish him well. Even the most cynical agnostic can see the beauty in that.
Though still wedded to Catholic doctrine, Pope Francis has become known as a modern Pope. In an individualistic culture that encourages people to be who they are and not just what their society asks them to be, that means being inclusive. “Who am I to judge?” he has said of Catholic gays and lesbians. He’s said that the church doesn’t need to be talking about the “same issues” of homosexuality and abortion all the …

Macho Macho Men

James M SherlockGreat (Ape) Expectations The science of why masculine men are sexy.   It’s no secret that men and women differ from each other physiologically; in fact it’s rather obvious. However, why these differences exist in the first place is often less clear. One aspect of these physiological differences that I study is the evolution of male facial shape. In contrast to females, males tend to have physically larger heads, with exaggerated jaw lines, thicker brows and heavier set features. It’s not only the case that male faces differ from females, but also that male faces show tremendous variation. This continuum, broadly speaking, spans highly masculine and feminine features with some males sporting enormous lantern jaws, with thick, rugged brows while others have soft, plump lips, high cheek bones and large, neotenous eyes [1]. A great deal of this variation is presumed to have arisen as a result of female preferences acting via sexual …